I’ve never read The Hobbit, but I’m going to start today because my son pointed out that I AM a Hobbit. He said, “Mom, Hobbits like to sit in their armchairs, and read and eat. They don’t like to go out on adventures because it takes them away from their books. Plus, they eat second breakfast.” I think he’s on to something. After all, Hobbit almost sounds like Hermit, and I love to just sit, read, and eat. This is why it defies all logic that I joined a Diet Bet game during the holidays, or anytime really. What the heck was I thinking?
Well, honestly, I thought it would be easy because my husband had UPPP surgery on December 17. For more about that, read this. So, I figured that I would just eat a lot of soup right along with Chris. This didn’t happen, of course. Whenever I think about dieting, I eat more. Plus, there’s that whole hating exercise thing, and not liking people. We introverts don’t like the gym because it involves people and chitchat. Also, my fellow germaphobes and I look at the machines as though we have blacklights for eyes. We can see the viruses dancing on the handlebars of bikes, weights, and elliptical machines. Nope. We Hobbit/Hermits must exercise at home.
I have always liked to dance. In fact, I wanted to be a Browardette at South Broward High School, but I couldn’t bring myself to ask my parents for the large sum of money needed. From what I heard, Browardettes had to pay for a ton of things like, special bras, at least four outfits, camp travel costs, makeup, etc. So, I did the next best thing; I took two years of dance classes as PE electives. I miss dance, and not only because I met one of my best friends in class. I would love to take dance classes now, but I can’t find a jazz dance class for people older than 6. It seems that older folks are supposed to take ballroom dancing, which doesn’t really interest me. I want to dance alone, to good music. Since I don’t want to make the little kids or their parents uncomfortable by joining a kid class, I came up with my own solution.
I have heard of people having kitchen dance parties, but my kitchen is too small. Also, since we have adopted three cats and two dogs, there’s usually anywhere from one to five animals begging for food at any time. Seriously, they act like they are starving to death. I’m surprised they haven’t figured out how to use the phone and call the Humane Society for help. So, unless I want to trip over a Great Dane and die from a granite countertop induced head injury, I can’t dance in the kitchen. The bathroom, though, has potential.
I live in a five level split home. Basically, the five levels are divided by half flights of stairs. So, from the outside, the house looks like your average two-story home. So, long story short, I have stairs in my bathroom. There are five steps that go from the large master bathroom to a “bonus room” that I use for my office. It’s big enough for dancing, and it has stairs for my own version of step aerobics. A couple of weeks ago, at the beginning of this whole Diet Bet thing, I put my headphones on, turned the volume up to eleven, and jammed out to some eighties tunes while doing the grapevines and spins that I learned way back in dance class at South Broward. I have been doing this about three times a week ever since. I may not win on So You Think You Can Dance, but I can burn calories without talking to strangers or touching shared exercise equipment. I call that a win-win.
If you like to dance, I hope you all get to have at least one dance party today, in whatever room works for you. Happy New Year!