In my never-ending quest to be geriatric at 42, um I mean 28, I have gone and scheduled myself 2 medical appointments in the same week. Plus, I have to take my son to the orthodontist. So, I will spend 3 out of 5 days in medical buildings. Well, not the whole day, but still. I hate when I do that. I feel like one of those elderly people who go to the doctor every week. What makes me feel even older is the fact that my doctors are all younger than me. I feel like I have stepped into an episode of Doogie Howser.
I saw the dentist yesterday because I broke my crown, and no I’m not Jack from Jack and Jill. I’m always at the dentist because I’m one of those lucky people who INHERITED bad teeth. Seriously! That’s a thing. I brush and floss at least 3 times a day, and I have 13 fillings and 2 crowns in my mouth. For REAL! So, he was able to fix my crown, even though I swear the guy is 12. I want to ask him when he is having his Bar Mitzvah. I’m not sure if he is even Jewish, but it seems like an appropriate question given his youth.
I’m seeing a cardiologist on Thursday because I have had heart palpitations for years. People usually just tell me it’s nerves, but I want to be sure because I don’t want to keel over. If I died no one around here would be able to find their keys or sweep cat litter off the floor. I haven’t met the cardiologist online, but I Google stalked her. If I am doing the degree math right, and I may not be since I am an English major, she is about 5. She looks anywhere from 5 to 8 in the picture on her web site. I feel like the crypt keeper. If she makes me do a stress test, I’m making her sit in the corner.
And they are not the only medical professionals I see who could blend in at a K-12 school. My primary doctor is 10, and has even mentioned that some issues I am having are “age related.” WHAT??? I still love her, but WHAT???
What about you all out there? Are your doctors younger than you, yet?