The REAL Bachelor

From the hash tag storm of social media discontent, I could tell that a lot of people out there were unhappy with this season of The Bachelor, including it’s ending, a non-engagement.  Even ever present Bachelor cheerleader Chris Harrison appeared disappointed that Juan Pablo had not told Nikki Ferrell that he loves her yet.  Um, Chris, that is because he doesn’t, and to quote Juan Pablo, “It’s OK.”

It is actually more realistic to not become engaged to somebody, or be truly in love with someone, you’ve been dating for 8 weeks, especially when you begin your special “relationship” by dating 25 people at the same time.  Cinderella fairy tales like that exist in theme parks not in “reality” TV or actual reality.

The Bachelor has a proven relationship failure rate.  Only 2 Bachelors, Jason Mesnick and Sean Lowe, out of 18 seasons have married contestants from the show.  Sean is the only one to marry the woman he gave his final rose to.  Jason ended up with his runner up after “the most dramatic After The Rose show ever.” I’m an English major, so I’m not even going to try to figure out the percentage for that failure rate, but I know it’s low.

In doing my research for this blog (Yes, I actually do research for blogs), I found a few interesting things. Elizabeth Kwiatkowski (what a humdinger of a last name there, Liz) of Realty TV World reports that Juan Pablo did The Bachelor to gain money and fame and become a “full blown brand.” Well, this is certainly shocking.  You mean to tell me that people who go on TV to air their dirty laundry do not do so to save baby seals? Next, you’ll tell me that televangelists are in it for the money.   You mean Juan Pablo had ulterior motives?

Yes, Juan Pablo was not really romantic, and in fact he was arrogant and rude throughout the season. Plus, the way he says “MMMM” or “It’s OK” to everything gives me a case of the chilly squirmies. Is it really a surprise that he has the emotional depth of a Mr. Turtle pool? He agreed to date 25 women, and as much as he talked about not wanting to embarrass his daughter with inappropriate behavior, he made out with nearly every one of them.  And lord knows what happened in the ocean. I bet Juan Pablo wanted publicity and to have a good time, like lots of other people in previous seasons of the Bachelor and Bachelorette, and he needed to use 2 names to do it.  Wasn’t that a clue right there?  The man could not just be Juan? Why is everyone so up in arms over this? He showed his true colors right from the beginning. This was the most realistic season of The Bachelor ever, but it needs to be more realistic. There are lots of people out there who would make good bachelors or bachelorettes.

How about an African American bachelor or bachelorette? Are there only white people looking for “love.” Kudos for having a Hispanic man this season, but I think we need more diversity here.

Show what really goes on in those shared bathrooms and kitchen. There are people who are COMPETING with each other for “love” and fame living TOGETHER in the Bachelor mansion.  You just KNOW that someone has scrubbed the toilet with someone’s toothbrush, or put a frog in someone’s bed.  I can just imagine someone has put Miralax in a competitor’s fancy flavored water and hid all of the toilet paper.  Show how crazy it really gets.

Where are the chubby single people?  Is everyone who is in search of love a stick figure or Barbie model? Are there no single people out there who don’t consume all of their calories in alcohol and hair spray?

Take them on real dates.  No one jets off to Vegas for dinner in real life unless that person is a Sheik or a politician.  Have the “couple” go to Outback and eat a Bloomin’ Onion for their “romantic” date.  That is what real people do.

What about a retired bachelor or bachelorette?  Sometimes people are ready for love at a later age.  A silver fox or a golden girl would make for a popular bachelor or bachelorette as people are living longer now.

In short, ABC, instead of trying to make this a “real” show about finding love in front of millions of people, why not make it a real show with real people?

It's OK. We can all date.
It’s OK. We can all date.

7 thoughts on “The REAL Bachelor

  1. Amen – I was watching that finale last night and was severely disgusted. I mean really it was very apparent what that guys goals were and it was NOT to find “love.” The girls pissed me off not him – however probably because they were on TV and had to play the “role” – it just angered me how they honestly tried to rationalize his “love” for them. They also kept spewing garbage about “this is what a girl dreams of” – really?? I NEVER dreamed of being on national television airing my dirty laundry, fighting for the attention of ONE man with 24 other bitches. Nope. Not me. I don’t think any girl should have that dream. Especially with a man like THAT. I’d LOVE to see older folks on here – more diversity – BRING IT! I’ve never watched the Bachelor and only watched it last night because I was in the kitchen too lazy to change the channel. Don’t think I will again unless they change it up. Great topic Lisa have a great one 🙂 -Iva

    1. Iva, you are like the sister I never had. Thanks for being with me on this. The only thing worse than how they act on The Bachelor is their behavior on Bachelor Pad. Why is there never an STD outbreak on the show. Now, that would be interesting.
      Keep warm today! More snow. 😦

  2. You are hilarious. Bloomin’ Onion, I love it! All truth! I was perplexed by this season but you’re right, it’s not real – people want their fairy tale. I was annoyed by Juan Pablo but also annoyed at the way he was harassed. Bullying is not cool at any age, Chris Harrison! Leave the schmuck alone already! He will be soon, anyway.

  3. Amen. I have nothing to add, besides “these shows make me sick,” because you’ve already said everything! P.S. – If you haven’t watched the internet parody called “Burning Love” then you haven’t lived.

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