My fellow blogger, friend, and snazzy Nick Mom Prom dresser Kathleen Gordon from Middletini invited me to go on a trip with her. This trip does not involve real airplanes, boats, or drugs. Travel without leaving my hermit home? Naturally I said YES to going on a blog tour with this glittery disco chick. So, last week, I climbed aboard her virtual tour bus. Now, it’s my turn to lead the tour. So, let’s board our plane and prepare for takeoff. I will start the field trip with my answers to a few questions. I know I don’t give you quite enough TMI on my blog, so you need more, right?
What Am I Working On? What aren’t I working on? The laundry, my day job, keeping this fur-filled house clean, maybe cooking dinner, volunteering at the zoo. Oh, you mean writing? Well, I’m working on a YA novel about the reincarnation of some of the members of the Twenty-Seven Club. It’s called The Lizard King Club. Here is a draft of the first chapter, Janis. I need to run away from home so I have time to finish it.
How Does My Work Differ From Others Of Its Genre? I give more TMI before 8:00 am than most people give all day. Seriously, I really lack a filter. I will talk about poop, periods, religion, politics, and anything else your mom told you not to talk about. Except kidneys. I can’t stand to talk about kidneys. One time, a man sat next to me on a flight to Chicago and talked about his kidney surgery the whole time. I thought I would need the barf bag.
Why Do I Write/Create What I Do? I hear voices in my head. They have to come out somehow. Writing seems to be a socially acceptable way of letting the voices out of your head. Mother says I shouldn’t talk to myself in public.
How Does Your Writing/Creating Process Work? HMMMM. Process? Oh, yeah, here it is. Basically, I get fantastic ideas when I’m either in the shower or driving. So, if I’m in the shower, I rinse quickly and stick my arm and one leg out to grab my iPhone. I quickly dictate something in Notes via Siri while dripping all over the floor. The process is similar when I’m driving only I dictate at red lights and I’m usually not dripping. Then, when I’m out of the shower and or not driving, I look at my notes and say things to myself like, “Who the fuck is Malcolm?” because Siri thinks I have a speech impediment.
Well, our short connecting flight has come to an end. Put up your tray tables, fasten your seatbelts and hold on for dear life while I attempt to land this bird. Someone hand me a drink.
Whew! We made it. Now, on to your next flight. Run to your gate as we are now boarding all first class passengers. You, my dear reader, are first class today. As George Carlin used to say, get IN the plane not ON it. It’s a lot less windy!
Gate A1: MEAGAN BROCKWAY lives on her small Pennsylvania farm with an assortment of animals that include a herd of horses, a flock of chickens, too many damn dogs and cats, and her husband and parents. She is currently working on some DIY project that involves cursing and beer drinking. Her blog, The Charming Farmer, is a tongue in cheek view on living the farm life while trying to maintain her sanity. A book may be in the future if she finds the time between feeding animals, cleaning up a variety pack of poop, or creating some new tutorial on how NOT to do it yourself. Now fly on over to Meagan’s blog and check out my two favorite entries: An Open Letter to the Chickens and Graves and Groundhogs.
Gate A2: LEA GROVER is a writer and toddler-wrangler living on Chicago’s South Side. When she isn’t cultivating an impressive dust bunny collection she waxes philosophic about raising interfaith children, marriage after a terminal cancer diagnosis, and vegetarian cooking. Her blog, Becoming SuperMommy, won second runner up during in Blogger Idol, and her work has been featured on the Huffington Post, Scary Mommy, The Daily Mail Online, The Chicago Tribune, iVillage Australia, Red Shoes Review, The Dusty Owl Quarterly, and her daughters’ toy refrigerator door. When she isn’t revising her upcoming memoir, she can be found singing opera to her children or smeared to the elbow in Townsend pastels. You can follow her work as Becoming SuperMommy on Facebook, Pinterest, Google+, and @bcmgsupermommy on Twitter. Two of her most popular blogs are Dear Less Than Perfect Mom and Remember, Remember Fifth of July .
Gate A3: TRACI is the momma behind all the drama over at A Day in the Life of a Drama Queen’s Momma. As a mother of 4, 3 of which are “slightly” dramatic girls, Traci spends her days breaking up fights, smoothing ruffled feathers (mostly in her daughter’s boas), and trying to keep her sanity by Facebooking the funny conversations she has with her youngest daughter, Brennan. She blogs about whatever tickles her fancy, but tries to season it all with a dash of her sarcastic wit. So, take off and check out Traci’s blogs with the most drama: A Brennan Bedtime Tale and All Aboard the Hoo Hoo Express .