Hey people living in the light square, I need someone to call the cops or something. My mean brother is at it again. He is trying to kill me. I know this because I have been really sick with throw up stuff, and my poop’s been all mushy. I haven’t even tried to eat it in the yard, and that’s one of my favorite treats. My tummy kind of hurts, and I’ve been super tired. I just want to nap in the sunny spots like all day. I think the cat put poison in my water. That’s the only explanation I can come up with.
My sister Lola saw the kitty over by my water even though he has some fancy water fountain that he likes to drink from. She took some pictures so we would have proof for mama. Mama just thought they were cute because she loves Andre like more than anything except for daddy, the boy, and that stinky red drink in the fancy bowl.
Not only do we have pictures as evidence, but the Mean Kitty also confessed that he wants to kill me in this blog. It’s like practically a real signed confession, only he didn’t put his paw print on it and he probably won’t. I will ask Orange Kitty to put his paw print on it and say that it was Mean Kitty. Mean Kitty is mean to him, too, so I know he will help me.
I wanna get Mean Kitty in trouble because I’m scared he will really kill me and also cause this sickness has been terrible. I’ve been really hungry from the throwing up and Mama wouldn’t let me eat my throw up, even though my belly was so empty. She said it was gross and she made me go outside while she cleaned it up and put chemical stuff on the floor. I don’t see what the big deal is. Cows eat their throw up all the time. They don’t let it come all the way out, but they bring it back up into their mouths and eat it again. Food is tasty and throw up is just warmer food that is easier to chew. Plus, then Mama wouldn’t have needed to clean it up.
Daddy was all worried about me and he took me to the doctor. This was no fun at all even though I love my doctor and all of her helper ladies. First, it was OK cause they were just petting me and looking at my mouth and stuff. But, I didn’t like it when they put some kind of stick in my butt to tell if I was too hot. They could’ve just asked me. I would’ve told them that I’m not hot. I just feel like throwing up. That’s it. It’s just a simple throw up sickness because the cat poisoned me.
I’m starting to feel better now. Mama and Daddy took super good care of me and made me special food with chicken, pumpkin, and rice in it. I love food, so I was really happy about that. I still don’t want to get sick again, even if it does mean that I get special food.
So, light square people, please send help to my house. I don’t want this Mean Kitty to kill me for real next time. As you can see, he is vicious.
Hey, readers, Sophie here again. If you want to help stop other animal murders, you can ask other humans to sign this.