Feline Frustrations

I've been forced to snuggle with my homicidal brother.
I’ve been forced to snuggle with my homicidal brother.

Humans,

There’s no nice way to say this, but I fear that Mother no longer loves me. She’s been kicking me out of her den at night so that she “can actually sleep.” I’m not sure what she means by that because I don’t wake her. I simply knead her belly gently, to insure good digestion as she rests. I also place my face close to her ears and purr so she has background noise to block out father’s snoring. I also curl up next to her lower back to provide a heating pad of sorts for all her aches and pains. Mother is about 200 in cat years. I also gently clean her arms as she sleeps. The woman subjects herself to water torture daily, as you humans tend to do, but her arms never cease to need an extra cleaning.

As helpful as I am, she insists on escorting me out of her chambers at night like a common hoodlum. And human friends, this is not the only evidence I have of mother’s indifference towards me. I have seen her being kind and loving to other animals that do not even live in our house. I’m not proud of this, but I looked through the woman’s small light square, where she has pictures and messages.   Some of the pictures make me sad. Mother is clearly cheating on all of her fur babies. Here are some examples:

Mother feeds other animals.
Mother feeds other animals.
Mother is holding some sort of foreign creature here.
Mother is holding some sort of foreign creature here.
I hope Mother is not thinking of adopting this creature.
Mother does not need another cat.

I do hope Mother is not thinking of bringing me back to jail, meaning the shelter. I have had a few homes before this one, and I would just like to stay here. I’m not sure what to do about this situation. I enjoy my home when the dogs aren’t barking, and I really have nowhere else to go. I suppose I will keep to the guest room at night, in order to keep away from the little yippy white dog that thinks she is some kind of police officer and the large black clumsy dog. I will snuggle up to a pillow in mother’s absence, but I’m not happy about this. I may need to soil the floor, or perhaps in a shoe, to announce my displeasure.

Thank you for reading, humans.

Purrs and Arm Licks,

Picaboo (Not Boo Boo)

18 thoughts on “Feline Frustrations

  1. And this post is exactly why despite all the love I receive during the night I don’t have the heart to close my fur babies out. Even if it would mean that I would gain more consistent sleep. 🙂

    1. Dear Brittany,
      Thank you for your kind words. I will leave your comment up on Mother’s light square (computer) so she can see it. The woman needs to see this and stop being so mean.
      Headbutts and love,
      Picabo

  2. Oh, Picabo, I am feeling you, my friend. As I’m sure you are, I am a fastidious feline and therefore bathe myself frequently during the night. To express my enjoyment, I sometimes emit delicate little smacking noises during my ablutions — kind of like a lullaby for Mother. And even though I find the gentle, repetitive activity of scratching, scratching, scratching my sensitive skin soothing and satisfying, apparently Mother does not appreciate this either. She pushes me off the bed (a little too hard if you ask me), often accompanied by an incoherent string of obscenities. Lucky I’m agile and can land on my feet so no physical harm is done. But the words wound. They wound, don’t they, Picabo?

    1. Mr. Moses,

      Indeed they do. What also hurts is the way Mother tricks me into leaving her chambers by walking out first and saying, “come on, Boo Boo.” So, I follow, even though I despise that name, and she runs back in and shuts the door on me like I’m trying to solicit religion. I think I may need to soil another pair of her slippers.

      Head Butts,
      Picabo

  3. If I were Boo Boo, I’d be legit angry about what I found on Mother’s light square. That exotic kitty with black tips on her ears is HAWT.
    Then again, any cat that would take a selfie with her tipples exposed probably isn’t wifey material.
    Just another misguided pussy with low self esteem stemming from daddy issues.
    You don’t have to stoop to that level, Boo Boo. And I know you won’t.

    1. Sophia, dear, I have found out that the cat is a lynx, which means it’s a scoundrel and a hooligan. I could destroy the thing if it were declawed like me.

      Respectfully,
      Picabo

  4. Yep, mine does all of that too and should I have the ill-advised notion to move in the night she will attack my feet through the blankets. Nothing like bleeding profusely to ruin a night’s sleep.

    1. EVERYONE needs a cat or three, Michelle. 🙂

      Oh, and my blog keeps putting your comments in spam. I’m going to need to smack it around for that.

    1. Linda, I thought the same thing, but the zoo keeper educated me. That right there is a wallaby. It is a much smaller creature than a kangaroo, but very similar. It totally snuggled up to me like a cat. So cute. Lisa

      Mother, I’m going to shit on your slippers. Picabo

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