IBS with Benefits

I have IBS-D. I specified the D because there are two types of IBS.  People with IBS-C have chronic constipation, whereas IBS-D sufferers beg Santa Claus for constipation every year.  Seriously.  Constipation would be a fucking gift to someone who goes five times a day on average.  Having IBS-D is like constantly reliving that one time you ate something from the roadside stand in Tijuana.

I’ve had IBS my whole life, so I’ve learned to cope with it. Even though shitting yourself silly can suck, there are some benefits to having IBS.

Never Obese – It’s like having bulimia, but they won’t put you on Intervention for it. I’m only mild to moderately overweight, not scooter level obese according to my doctor.  Just kidding. Doctors don’t talk to patients that way.  What I’m trying to say is I’m a little heavy around the haunches, but I’m nowhere near being on a Discovery Channel show or having Richard Simmons cry at my bedside during a Deal a Meal commercial. I eat enough to be bigger, but I just shit it out constantly.

Come on over to Knot So Subtle to learn about the other benefits to having IBS.

Now my bathroom smells like cinnamon spice and poop.
Now my bathroom smells like cinnamon spice and poop.

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