Unless you have given up all things screen and only entertain yourself with fine literature and herbal tea, you have probably heard that Corey Feldman is trying to have a music career. If you haven’t seen Corey’s “performance” from Friday’s Today Show, you need to go watch this with the sound up. Frightening, right?
When I saw it, I stared the screen like I was having a night terror. I thought I was awake, but surely I was just having a vivid nightmare. The “concert series” happened during my least favorite part of the show, Billy Bush’s hour. Billy just has all of the endearing qualities of a sandpaper tampon. I only watch this portion of Today because Tamron is usually on. On Friday, I was not only disappointed by her absence, but scarred by a “musical performance” that should have been courtesy of Lorne Michaels and the SNL gang. Matt Lauer would not have let this nonsense happen during his hour.
I stared at a hoody- wearing 45-year-old Corey “dab” like a teen kid. I turned to my husband and asked if I was hallucinating. He said no and “1994 called. They’d like their goth industrial lifestyle back.” I spit my coffee.
I Tweeted my husband’s comment because it was hilarious. I tagged the Today Show and Corey Feldman in my Tweet. Then, I turned off the TV and tried to forget goth boy and his Party City costumed angles. I thought nothing of it until the next day, when I opened Twitter and saw that Corey had blocked me. Huh? I’m not a big influencer, just a little chubby writer with a small following. I guess Corey blocked me because he doesn’t want the truth. He wants to do lopsided jazz hands in his gothic hoody and pretend he is a rock god. I’m surprised the people in his life have let him do this.
We all get to a point in our careers, hobbies, or delusions when we go overboard. This is usually when our families, friends, or social services people nudge us back on track. Where are Corey’s people? Forfuckssake, where is Simon Cowell? He has told people who CAN sing that they sound like a caterwauling drunk wedding guests. Certainly, Corey rates a rabies ridden cartoon bat comment.
It’s really sad that Corey is getting praise for this. Billy Bush and his not Tamron co-host ran right out to pat him on the back and tell him he was awesome as soon as he finished what appeared to be a public relapse. There are so many real musicians out there who try achieve success for YEARS, all without bastardizing Marilyn Manson and Victoria’s Secret.
I may start watching Fox News if this is the kind of bullshit the Today Show features.