Tag Archives: life

“WE ALL Want Something Beautiful.”

I had forgotten how much I loved (Mr. Jones and Me) until it came on in the car earlier this afternoon.  My husband was driving, and I was singing along at the top of my tone-deaf lungs.  I’m glad my husband was still able to concentrate on driving.  I definitely did not get the “Petty singing voice” that I keep hearing about.  It skipped a generation and went straight to my son.

Mr. Jones and Me is probably one of the few songs I love that was not produced in the 80’s by a British band wearing extensive eye make-up.  I admire it because I’m a word person, and the lyrics just speak to how alike humans are.  We spend a lot of time pointing out our differences, but we all really do “want something beautiful,” whether it is a beautiful marriage, a beautiful home, beautiful children, beautiful scenery, beautiful art, or lots of beautiful money to count. Everyone has his or her own idea of that something beautiful. To me, Mr. Jones and Me is beautiful because it speaks about similarities that unite us, rather than differences that keep us fighting.  Really, if we are honest with ourselves, there are a lot of things that WE ALL do.

  1. We all talk about each other. Ever since elementary school, I have witnessed the same ladies’ room drama.  It usually begins with some angry girl or woman putting her hands on her hips as she stands by the row of sinks, and saying, “That @#$# was TALKING ABOUT ME!”  Really?  No way.  How dare she? Do you know that you are talking about her right now?  Everyone talks about everyone else.  It’s just what people do.  Eleanor Roosevelt said, “Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.”  Well, color me tri-minded, Eleanor.  Like all people, there are different sides to my personality.  This is because I’m not a hamster. Sometimes, I talk about ideas, sometimes events, and yes, sometimes, people.  People are interesting.  That is why EVERYONE talks about each other, and that is why trashy memoirs sell.  People want to know about other people. Get over it.
  2. We all find each other attractive.  We all have eyes, and most of our eyes can see.  I said most.  So, it is natural to notice how things, and people, look.  Even married people can find people attractive.  This does not mean they will have an affair with whoever they think is good looking.  Let’s face it, John Stamos and I are not going to run off together, but I still think he is pretty.
  3. We all change.  When I was going through a break-up, my ex looked at me and said, “You changed,” like I had just murdered a basket of kittens. Of course I did! I was 19 when we met, and 28 when we parted ways.  I grew up. I went to grad school.  I read. I met people.  I learned more.  I got my hair cut. I let it grow out.  I got it cut again.  A thousand things happened to mold me into a different person.  I have changed a lot from 28 to 41, too.  If you are not changing, you are not growing.
  4. We all have beliefs that others don’t understand. We want something to believe in, whether it is our spouse, our country, the universe, religion, science, or the kindness of others. I have a lot of Christian friends.  I’m not a Christian. It’s not a belief than ever rang true to me. I would never argue with my friends or ridicule them; I just don’t agree with them.  I DO find a lot of truth in other philosophies, like Buddhism and Ancient Astronaut Theory, that they may find odd.  We all have to think for ourselves and come to our own conclusions.  People can believe in whatever they want, whether it is aliens, ghosts, reincarnation, resurrection, or countless other things.
  5. We all make tasteless jokes.  I did last week.  I was having horrible tooth pain when I found out that Cory Monteith from Glee died from an overdose of heroin and alcohol.  I told my husband, “He probably had tooth pain.”  It’s probably not funny to most of you, unless you have actually had major dental pain.  Then you KNOW I am telling the truth, and you are laughing.

Today is Sunday, and in my opinion, it is a day when a lot of people focus on their differences.  Some people go to this church; others go to that church.  Others went to church on Saturday, or they went to temple on Saturday. Others don’t go to church at all and try their best to go out to breakfast “before the after church crowd gets there.”  But, hey, we all want to eat, and who doesn’t like a good breakfast out?

"WE ALL Want Something Beautiful."

I had forgotten how much I loved (Mr. Jones and Me) until it came on in the car earlier this afternoon.  My husband was driving, and I was singing along at the top of my tone-deaf lungs.  I’m glad my husband was still able to concentrate on driving.  I definitely did not get the “Petty singing voice” that I keep hearing about.  It skipped a generation and went straight to my son.

Mr. Jones and Me is probably one of the few songs I love that was not produced in the 80’s by a British band wearing extensive eye make-up.  I admire it because I’m a word person, and the lyrics just speak to how alike humans are.  We spend a lot of time pointing out our differences, but we all really do “want something beautiful,” whether it is a beautiful marriage, a beautiful home, beautiful children, beautiful scenery, beautiful art, or lots of beautiful money to count. Everyone has his or her own idea of that something beautiful. To me, Mr. Jones and Me is beautiful because it speaks about similarities that unite us, rather than differences that keep us fighting.  Really, if we are honest with ourselves, there are a lot of things that WE ALL do.

  1. We all talk about each other. Ever since elementary school, I have witnessed the same ladies’ room drama.  It usually begins with some angry girl or woman putting her hands on her hips as she stands by the row of sinks, and saying, “That @#$# was TALKING ABOUT ME!”  Really?  No way.  How dare she? Do you know that you are talking about her right now?  Everyone talks about everyone else.  It’s just what people do.  Eleanor Roosevelt said, “Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.”  Well, color me tri-minded, Eleanor.  Like all people, there are different sides to my personality.  This is because I’m not a hamster. Sometimes, I talk about ideas, sometimes events, and yes, sometimes, people.  People are interesting.  That is why EVERYONE talks about each other, and that is why trashy memoirs sell.  People want to know about other people. Get over it.
  2. We all find each other attractive.  We all have eyes, and most of our eyes can see.  I said most.  So, it is natural to notice how things, and people, look.  Even married people can find people attractive.  This does not mean they will have an affair with whoever they think is good looking.  Let’s face it, John Stamos and I are not going to run off together, but I still think he is pretty.
  3. We all change.  When I was going through a break-up, my ex looked at me and said, “You changed,” like I had just murdered a basket of kittens. Of course I did! I was 19 when we met, and 28 when we parted ways.  I grew up. I went to grad school.  I read. I met people.  I learned more.  I got my hair cut. I let it grow out.  I got it cut again.  A thousand things happened to mold me into a different person.  I have changed a lot from 28 to 41, too.  If you are not changing, you are not growing.
  4. We all have beliefs that others don’t understand. We want something to believe in, whether it is our spouse, our country, the universe, religion, science, or the kindness of others. I have a lot of Christian friends.  I’m not a Christian. It’s not a belief than ever rang true to me. I would never argue with my friends or ridicule them; I just don’t agree with them.  I DO find a lot of truth in other philosophies, like Buddhism and Ancient Astronaut Theory, that they may find odd.  We all have to think for ourselves and come to our own conclusions.  People can believe in whatever they want, whether it is aliens, ghosts, reincarnation, resurrection, or countless other things.
  5. We all make tasteless jokes.  I did last week.  I was having horrible tooth pain when I found out that Cory Monteith from Glee died from an overdose of heroin and alcohol.  I told my husband, “He probably had tooth pain.”  It’s probably not funny to most of you, unless you have actually had major dental pain.  Then you KNOW I am telling the truth, and you are laughing.

Today is Sunday, and in my opinion, it is a day when a lot of people focus on their differences.  Some people go to this church; others go to that church.  Others went to church on Saturday, or they went to temple on Saturday. Others don’t go to church at all and try their best to go out to breakfast “before the after church crowd gets there.”  But, hey, we all want to eat, and who doesn’t like a good breakfast out?

“Hold on to it like Santa Claus.”

That is what I said to my hairdresser/friend, M, in a dream last night.  I wasn’t referring to my hair, as my hair is nowhere as large and jolly as Santa, though it is red. And it is a LOVELY shade of red thanks to my FANTASTIC hairdresser.   Anyway, in the dream, I was referring to M’s new baby daughter.  In real life, M does not have a baby daughter, and she is not going to have one any time soon, so, I’m not sure where that came from. 

 So, we were standing in an elementary school hallway, when Dream M shared what a difficult time she was having with the new baby.  That’s when I said, “Hold on to it like Santa Claus.  Soon it will be like she was a mythical creature.”  M gave me a look that said, “I don’t want to hear all about teenagers again,” but she never actually said that in the dream.  Then I woke up. 

 And I started thinking about what a poet and philosopher I am in dreamland.  Really, little kids do become mythical creatures as they age.  When I look at my son, I try so hard to find that little blond boy who wore costumes everywhere.  Sometimes, I catch him, just for a second, in a smile or laugh, or love of  “worms and dirt.”  I started thinking that I should have held on to him like a child hugging Santa, back when I was still allowed to hug him. 

 As I got up, and made coffee, and heated up some sweet potatoes for breakfast (Why not?  They are good for you and your stomach doesn’t know what time it is.), I started expanding the metaphor to include, well, everything.  So many people, things, and times in our lives come and go, so quickly.  They eventually become foggy memories.  A lot of times we don’t appreciate them when we have them. 

My husband did not hold on to Santa in 1974ish.
My husband did not hold on to Santa in 1974ish.

 

 For example, I remember being sixteen and desperately wanting to be a grown up, so I could do whatever I wanted.  Because ALL grown ups can do whatever they want.  They just happen to want to work and pay bills and clean the house and do laundry and clean up the excrement of others, both furry and non-furry. Really, I should have been clinging to my high school years like Santa, holding on to it like it was the Christmas morning of my life. 

 In a way it was, but in a way right now is like Christmas Day.  All of the presents are unwrapped. I have everything I have ever wanted right now, a loving, wonderful husband, a creative, funny, smart son, lots of great friends, and a job that allows me to wear jammies or yoga pants daily, and cats and dogs who follow me everywhere.  I’m going to cling to all of this like Santa.  I’m going to squeeze this red velvet suit of a life for all it’s worth.  New Year’s Eve is just around the corner.  Soon, it will all be a memory.